While talking with a caregiver the other day, I was touched by how she lamented the loss of order in her home as she cares for her husband who has Alzheimer's. She said she hasn't seen the top of her dining room table for eons. I told her that it was okay because I hadn't seen the top of my desk forever.
She smiled. She understood the humor I tried to inject into the conversation. She appreciated the momentary diversion and knew I wasn't making fun of her housekeeping skills or making light of something that obviously concerned her.
I quickly grasped the frustration of disorder in her life, a life in which she had been able to control much of her environment, keeping people and pets in line for decades until recently.
It wasn't just clutter; it was chaos.
"That isn't me," she said with a sigh.
Alzheimer's not steals only our loved ones' memories and lives, it works tirelessly to destroy other corners of our world … our skills, our simple, yet important, accomplishments that maintain our dignity and our homes and our lives.
Think of any caregiver you know, no matter what health challenges confront their loved ones. Offer to sit with or entertain their loved one. They may appreciate that simple break to clear off the dining room table at their own pace … to sort and shred to their heart's content … to regain their little corner of order in a chaotic world.
It's a priceless and well-deserved victory.
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