Monica's book tour #9

OK, now where was I on this crazy trip …

Ah, yes, Friday, May 8, Roger and I left the Universal land of Mickey Mouse and friends in Orlando and headed toward the Gulf side where I was scheduled to speak in the afternoon at a library there and spend the weekend with Roger's family in the Tampa area.

I knew this was no ordinary library … no library is … because I knew this place. It was a facility I had visited nearly every time I had gone to visit my in-laws because my mom-in-law Janice devoured books, and we'd make a trip to return a stack and pick up a new one. She loved cooking books and a variety of non-fiction and fiction volumes. I'd entertain myself in the history and biographical sections until she had made her selections or tired.

The cooking guides were Janice's plate of simple and exotic fare, much of which she could not sample in reality but could savor with her imagination. A damn disease, which had claimed her life in 2000 at the age of 61, had kept her from eating all the things she really wanted, especially the last couple of years.

Now, I had gotten Roger out the door to visit his family about once a year. Through 2000, I had gone to visit once or twice a year since my in-laws had moved there in 1992. However, in planning for this trip, I realized I had been back to Florida only once since 2000, and that was in fall 2002. I was terribly ashamed of myself because I love my dad-in-law and brothers- and sisters-in-law deeply. And I even had a nephew I had never seen. I'd had time to go to Europe and Israel and around the U.S. for writing projects but not interrupted my schedule to go to Florida.

Ouch. I can feel Janice shaking her finger at me from heaven.

I'm telling you all that so that you'll better understand what happened when we arrived in town and went straight to Roger's dad's house, where I'd drop off Roger and go on to my presentation. I greeted and hugged my husband's father, chit-chatted for about 10 minutes, and asked Roger to get whatever he needed out of the van because I had to leave.

HAD to leave.

Not because of the clock. I simply had to cry … and I did when we stepped outside. My heart was breaking in seeing that he had aged, that he was much more frail. Roger hugged me and said that his daddy has slowed down. I needed no convincing there.

And I cried all the way to the library where I finally dried my eyes and gathered my stuff to go inside and talk about "I Almost Forgot to Laugh: Coping with Alzheimer's and Dementia." Mary, the librarian, was so wonderful and accommodating, as were some of the members of the sponsoring Friends of the Library who put out a nice spread of iced tea and snacks for afterward.

I learned much from speaking to this group of individuals who have dealt with or are now facing the terrible disease of Alzheimer's. They shared with me some of the light and memorable moments that have sustained them during the more demanding minutes or hours. I encouraged them to discover their loved one's memories and personality before they vanish, to not let good moments slip away.

I met some wonderful people, talked in more depth with some afterward, and make some great connections. Even sold some books but more importantly, filled the coffers of my passion for writing and speaking to beyond its capacity.

Add to that a vow to be a better and more attentive daughter and sister-in-law, and I bet that library had no idea of what they had put into circulation that day, a whole new volume of my life.