Pepaw's Christmas wish - part 3

Continued from previous posting about Pepaw's Christmas wish part 2 …

Roger and I walked his dad down the hallway to his room. We had opted for the more expensive, yet necessary, single room for Pepaw because he had gotten into a fist fight with his first roommate over whether their door should be open or closed. (Pepaw wanted it closed.) It had sent the roomie to the hospital to make sure he wasn't seriously injured, which thankfully he wasn't.

It also sent Pepaw to the mental health floor of the hospital for a second time to get his rage under control. Within a few days of moving into the secure Alzheimer's facility, he had earned his first trip to the hospital after going on a rampage, throwing things, including his prized bowling balls, and ripping the towel bar off the wall and swinging it above his head as he terrified other residents and challenged the staff as he ranted in the hallways. He was desperate to get out and even knocked out the screened window in his room and escaped outside where he told the staff he was waiting for his son to pick him up.

That memory still breaks my heart even at this moment, as does the time I sat with him in the hospital and reassured him that he'd be able to go home soon.

We had few options. No words or kindnesses or hugs or diversions or truths or lies or even Walker, Texas Ranger could calm him. He could not understand how we were trying to protect him, and he certainly couldn't comprehend that he had Alzheimer's or what it even was. We hated to do it, but we had to rely on some medication to stem the rage. It didn't take much, but it calmed him to the Pepaw I had come to know and love.

Thankfully he was able to return to this Alzheimer's facility and has adjusted pretty well since then. I have also come to love the staff because they take such good care of Pepaw and understand his little quirks and questions, especially, "Got any candy?" or "Is Walker on TV?" God love him and them …

As we entered Pepaw's room on this cold December night, I noticed his packed suitcase was still by the door. Nothing had changed. He was always ready to go though had not asked for almost two months to leave. Ah, good also, that he hadn't again packed up all the family photos we had arranged on a table for him. That was very good.

Roger moved some of the photos aside to make room for the Christmas tree. He focused on that while I tried to engage Pepaw in the holiday spirit.

“We brought you a couple of things.”

Instead, he looked up at the clock on the wall.

“It’s 15 minutes until 7 o’clock. I already got a bunch of junk here.”

He pointed to his chair. I opened a little ripped package, which contained a fleece scarf.

“That’s nice,” I said, making eye contact. “That’ll be warm.”

He had received a packet of letters from the students in his daughter Lora’s classroom.

I said, “Wow, that’s nice! Did you read them?”

He recited the address, his address, on the big envelope. “I read the whole thing.” I don't think he understood my question, but it was all right.

I handed him a bag with the flannel shirt and Gunsmoke DVDs. “That’s for you. That’s your Christmas.”

Pepaw promptly set it down in the chair.

“I was just fixin’ to tell Roger I want to go with him and get out of here right now.”

“We’ll see what we can do,” my husband answered patiently.

“I want to get out of here right now if you’ll take me, okay?”

“I don’t have my car here,” Roger said. Well, he wasn’t lying. We had driven mine.

Pepaw looked at me. “You gonna take me over to her house?”

“Maybe a little later,” Roger said.

I changed the subject. “You said you wanted a little Christmas tree, so I brought you one!”

Roger showed him the tree and turned on the lights. To me, it was the most beautiful tree I had seen all year as the brilliant colors illuminated the darkened corner of the room. This, this will engage Pepaw. I waited for his smile …

To be continued